Sorry about the drunken ramblings yesterday, but my White Sox buzz was rollin’ Wednesday Night and the grammar/spell check must have been ignored! I guess that happens when you try to write a masterpiece after drinking Tecate at the bar and then capping the night mixing cherry-flavored Whiskey, Propel, and some leftover Chardonnay to get the creative juices flowing…and I probably shouldn’t have slippin’ that Kodiak in!
As for last night, I have to admit a had the sweats last night as I watched the ESPN ticker scroll across and didn’t find anything I wagered on. I promised myself I would not go to the baseball window until the NBA playoffs were over, and while it was only 1 night, I feel like I just got out of rehab and passed my first bar without stopping. But enough about my therapy, we have the playoffs starting Saturday and Part 2 of my “If you don’t know, now you know” NBA Regular Season Awards. As for my breakdown of the playoffs, give me a little time…my boss almost fired me this morning and I'm heading to Minneapolis for a weekend of debauchery with my Homeboys. What I do have for you is three more awards (my favorite black, white, & foreign ballers) and three more beautiful pics (my favorite white, black, & foreign hotties). Have a Stephen Jackson type of weekend fellas and make sure to check back tomorrow for my ATS Playoff Picks!
THE PAUL MOKESKI AWARD
-The White Hoopster who’s better than you think-
In his 9th season, Harping (12 ppg, 5 reb. 49 fg%) once again proved that multiple knee surgeries and the uncertainty of his minutes would not effect his consistent and sometimes dominate play. I know the word dominate is a stretch, but when Harpring is sneaking to open spots, cutting to the hole, and knocking down open jumpers the Jazz are a completely different squad. Over the course of the season, he’s played three different positions off the bench, hasn’t been caught firing a gun in the air at a strip club, and understands when he needs to light-up a lazy defender and when he needs to stay out of Boozer, Williams, & Okur’s way. In a game against Philly earlier in the year, Sloan’s stars looked a little lackadaisical and Harpring proceeded to knockdown 10 of 14 shots in 19 minutes to seal a victory. Especially with AK-47 playing like he hasn’t been following his girl’s once a year freebee and partying like a Russian rockstar, Matt responded by dropping 31 (13-19 FGs) in a contest, had 18 games where he shot over 60%, and plays the kind of white-man defense the reminds you of the old dude at the YMCA. While still showing some surprising athleticism at times, Harpring knows how to get to the line, how to annoy the piss out of a hung-over brotha, and knows how to stay in the good graces of the owner and the fans by staying out of bars called the Man-Hole!
THE RICKEY PIERCE AWARD
-The Black Hoopster who’s better than you think-
To start, as a youngster dominating the driveway like Brian Griese after a party, I would count down the seconds and pretend to be the porn-stached Ricky Pierce. Just like Ricky did his fair-share of bouncing from team to team, Ime Udoka has done the same but not as NBA journeyman. The 29 year-old former Portland St. Viking spent the majority of his career overseas and with various minor-league basketball affiliates. Before starting 75 games for the Trailblazers this year, the 6-6 G/F had played 28 minutes of NBA action with the Lakers in 03-04 and 115 minutes with the Knicks in 05-06. Just like Anthony Parker of the Raptors, Ime developed his game outside of the NBA and became a defensive stopper on the perimeter, more aware of his limitations on the court, and gradually become an unbelievablely relieable jump-shooter. Within the first few weeks of the season, it became apparent the Nate McMillian had found the glue-guy that his team of immature youngsters needed. Udoka averaged just over 28 minutes a game for Nate, usually was responsible for the opponents top wing player, enabled rookie Brandon Roy to operate with the ball in his hands more freely, shot the fricken lights-out when left alone. (46-fg% and 41-3pt%), and never seemed to make a mistake ( 1.0 Turnovers per game). Congrats Ime, you the shiznit and the reason I luv the NBA.