*Greggy G’s NBA Regular Season: 146-106 ATS
*Greggy G’s NBA Playoff Special: 22-20 ATS
A pretty uneventful evening of victories…1-1 with a push on the ATS diamond and another embarrassing loss on the softball field for Smoke Daddy. While we hit like Bobby Abreu in his contract year, we ran the bases like Jacque Jones with one-leg and still have trouble preventing the big 10 run inning. Considering the fact that I had 4 grenades of Mickey’s Ice and some lip-candy during the game, I have to say I was impressed with my outfield play…with the exception of a miss-timed dive that made me look Jim Edmonds on crack.
But enough about a bunch of washed-up drunks pretending to play softball, we’re a day away from the start of the Spurs ring-ceremony and the baseball gods have given me a tip on a few plays. I wish I could tell ya the Cavs can make this a series, but I’d give better odds to Roger Clemens sitting on the bench with his teammates than the LeBron’s makin’ it to game 6. Speaking of roundball, how about Mr. Durant’s inability to bench press a porn-star holding a midget once at NBA draft combine…aka 185 lbs! I know he dominated the Big 12 as a freshman, but after watchin’ Shaun Livingston struggle to find minutes his first few years and proceed to blow-out his lower half this year, I have a feeling Kevin may take a few more years to develop than people think. But enough hoop talk, there’s nuttin’ to bet on and it’s time for the baseball maven to go to work. Take it light Homeboys, and always remember to tip your dancers!
NEW YORK YANKEES @ CHICAGO WHITE SOX (UNDA 10)
Less than 3 weeks ago, Chien-Ming Wang-er allowed 1 run against my Sox thru 7, while Javier Vazquez thru 8 innings of shut-out ball in last start. And check out Ozzie’s lineup last night…One guy is hittin’ ova .280 (Jim Thome .281), while everybody else is hittin’ under .250. As for the Yanks bats tonight, this is where Greggy G the baseball maven comes in…Torre’s boyz faced a soft-tossin’ lefty last night and I have feeling it’ll take a few innings for them to get used the harder throwin’ righty tonight. Yeah, I know I’m pretty frickin’ amazing…Yankees/Sox 5-8 total runs
DETROIT TIGERS (1.5) @ TEXAS RANGERS
Kevin Milwood sucks donkey balls! In his last five starts, he’s givin-up 26 runs in just ova 23 innings pitched. Overall, his ERA is just unda 7 and he’s lookin’ more and more like David Wells by the day. As for Detroit, Verlander (5-2 3.44) is one of the best young pitchers in the AL and always seems to raise his game when the Tigers are coming off a lose…Tigers by 3-5 runs
HOUSTON ASTROS @ COLORADO ROCKIES (-150)
Listen, if I lose this game I’ll count it as a 1.5 lose in my overall record. BTW, if you don’t understand what -150 means you should stop coming to this website and just listen to Stuart Scott lame-azz all day! Last night, in a rare Houston win, there was a bench clearing brawl and I saw all the ole’ crabby Astros riled-up. Just like my bookie told me about the day after using Viagra, don’t expect them to be too sharp today. My guess is Biggio, Ausmus, Lorreta, etc. will struggle against the Rockies best pitcher the last few years (even though…Rockies best pitcher = the sluttiest hooker), while the washed-up Woody Williams (2-7 5.50) shouldn’t find too much luv with the Colorado air or the fact that the Rockies first 4 hitters are battin’ OVA .320! Now that’s some sweet shiznit at the top of the order…Rockers by 3-5 runs