ATS - College BB: 7-4 NFL: 21-19 NBA: 27-32 MLB: 116-91
Yes, I know I need to stop playing the Mavs, but it’s like crack to a relaxation therapist …like the feeling of OPP to Travis Henry & Jason Caffey…like a new resume to Bobby Petrino…like driving 45 miles out of your way when gas is $4/gallon to find a video-rental place where you won’t run into anybody you know…like picking a profession you suck at for Ron & Norv Turner… like a hot model after marriage for Tony Parker…like beef jerky to Tank Johnson…like Wasabi Funyuns to a stoner…like fat-white girls for black-guys…like any nationality (except white) and anorexic girls for white-guys…like beer-bongs and tribal tats for frat-guys…and finally, like a hairy mustache for the chick working at your local grocery store! Thankfully, those bastards aren’t on the docket again tonight!
DENVER BRONCOS @ HOUSTON TEXANS (OVA 47)
This is going to be a shoot-out that would make Jamaal Tinsley’s entourage proud! Cutler, Marshall, Stokley, & whatever running back they choose have been on-fire lately averaging over 31 ppg over their last 5, while the Texans always seem to throw for almost 300 yards and have averaged over 25 ppg at home this season. Not to mention, this game is indoors, both teams are in the bottom 3rd of overall team-defense, and my Homeboy from Iowa State, The Sageanator, will be the starting signal-caller coming-off a 3 TD/0 INT performance last week. As for Cutler, he’s looked sharper by the game and is coming-off a 4 TD/0 INT. Finally, playing the OVA is like heading to Vegas…no matter how much your down, there’s always time to catch-up.
Final Score: BRONCOS 34 TEXANS 31
…and now for my basketball picks and lingerie specials!
SAN ANTONIO SPURS @ LOS ANGELES LAKERS (-5)
I’m not saying you should bet the Lakeshow because I read all the gossip tabloids, but the Tony Parker cheating on Eva story that broke yesterday has blown-up like Tony Romo’s horizontal-humpin’ options. Especially with the game in Hollywood, I have a feeling Mr. Longoria may be a lil’ distracted this evening. I know there’s a slight chance Timmy D may be back for the Spurs, but I’m guessing he’ll be a little rusty or out-of-sync if does suit-up…and from what I hear he’s out! As for Kobe and his bag o’ teammates he’s not too fond of, they’ve actually played will of late winning 3 in-a-row and are getting some big-time contributions for Odom, Radmanovic, Bynum, & a better than advertised bench. I know it’s tough to invest $$$ against the defending champs, but this is a statement game for Kobe & Phil…while the Spurs will be knee deep in “No Comment” statements regarding Parker’s wondering French Fry!...Lakers by 4-8 points
MIAMI (FLA) HURRICANES @ MISSISSIPPI ST BULLDOGS (-5)
I’m aware that the Hurricanes are undefeated, but they’ve only played one game on the road and the only decent competition they’ve faced has been Providence & St. John’s. As for the 5-3 Bulldogs, they’ve lost to undefeated #15 Clemson by 2, lost at then #18 Southern Illinois, and will have the best player on the floor tonight in 6-4 G Jamont Gordon (18 ppg, 6 rpg, 4 apg). Gordon plays stronger than his size and will have the advantage of playing against the short backcourt of the Hurricanes, while Sr. F-C Charles Rhoades (16 ppg, 7 rpg, 2 bpg) matches-up perfectly with Miami’s Sr. F-C Anthony King (11 ppg, 9 rpg, 2 bpg). And finally, just like my wallet can attest to, early in the year teams struggle twice as hard when hitting the road…especially one’s that haven’t done it since November 18th!...MST by 8-12 points
NFL/NBA TEASER SPECIAL
BRONCOS/TEXANS OVA (teased to 41)
WASHINGTON WIZ (teased to +10) @ MAIMI HEAT
I don’t care that the Heat have won two straight (@LAC, @PHX) after losing 5 in-a-row. Chris “I look like Frankie Muniz’s little brother” Quinn is starting at PG, while they only bench players getting any action are Alonzo & Ricky Davis. As for the Wiz, they’ve been playing with a chip on their shoulder with Agent Zero out and finally have a chance to prove they’re legit to Charles Barkley and the TNT boys. SF Caron Butler has been playing out of his mind this season (23 ppg, 7 rpg, 4 apg, 52 fg%), Antawn Jamison seems healthy for the 1st time in years (21 ppg, 11 rpg), and the bench has been contributing in unexpected fashion (this Tuesday, Andray Blatche & Roger Mason combined for 21 points, 10 reb., 3 ass, 3 blks). I know D-Wade seems back to his old self and The Diesel is looking more mobile, but DeShawn Stevenson & Brandon Haywood actually match-up pretty good and should be able to keep this thing from a double-digit victory…Heat by 2-6 points