Inside Plays

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 20-14 ATS...59%
NCAA: 9-2 - NFL: 5-8 - Teasers: 6-4 - Hotties: 113-0
If u want 2 skip my Baseball Preview, Click here for ATS Pigskin

Instead of embarrassing himself yesterday, Al Davis could've looked sweet at the White Sox Black-Out Night!

As a lifelong Southside fan, I don’t feel the slightest bit of guilt for not jumping on Ozzie’s bandwagon this year. As a realist more than dreamiest, with Carlos Quentin entering the season w/ 14 career HRs & a .230 average, rookie Alexei Ramirez looking more in need of calories than a starting job, and two young hurlers (2007: Gavin Floyd 1-5, 5.27 & John Danks 6-13, 5.50 that unexpectedly become staff aces, who in their right mind would have picked the Sox to win the Central.

Just like our friend, with the sweet black background at The Cell, Ozzie's boys looked almost perfect!

And last night, what an atmosphere at US Cellular as the Black-Out theme was a touch of genius. While some think the Sox will be heading to Tropicana on fumes, the combination of playing with house-money and having plenty of veterans that were around during their World Series run makes this a dangerous team. In my opinion, if Javier can beat the Rays tonight, the Sox will beat the young kids from Tampa.

As for the Cubbies…
While the Cubs may look flashier at the top of their line-up, the Dodgers talent is much more disciplined!

Just like being a fan of both the ba-donka-donk and “Wear-it-as-a-Hat”-azz, I’m one of the rare breeds that will be rooting for the Cubs unless they play Dewayne Wise & Co. That being said, I honestly believe the Northsiders have a much tougher opening round. To start, no matter what Sweet & Salty Lou says, the Cubs have a 100 years of pressure hanging over their head and vivid memories of last year’s playoff disaster. Throw-in a Dodgers line-up that might be the toughest 1 thru 4 order in the National league even if Rafael Furcal (.439 OB%) doesn’t start (Matt Kemp .290, 18 HR, 35 SB - Russell Martin .385 OB%, 13 HRs, - Manny MFin Rameriz – Andre Ethier .305, 20 HRs), veteran sluggers like Nomar & Kent waiting in the wings, and former Chicago speedsters Juan Pierre & Pablo Ozuna looking to reek havoc, tonight’s opener is a must win for Cubdom.

While Dempster has looked as solid in-front of the home-crowd as our friend, the playoffs are a whole new stage!

While Dempster has been lights-out in Wrigley this year, this is a whole new ballgame for the redhead and he’ll be toeing the rubber against a playoff tested vet in Derek Lowe…who btw, had his best season since 2002 (14-11, 3.24) and looked like Cy Young against the Cubs in two starts (14 innings & 3 ER while holding the Cubs to a .204 average). In my humble but correct opinion, the Cubs roll tonight if Ryan rolls through the 1st inning unscathed…if he doesn’t, expect to see the first round of tears from hotties and drunk fratboys in Wrigleyville.

With that, time to give you a few more lovely ladies and...

GREG GAMBLE'S SATURDAY COLLEGE PIGSKIN ATS WINNER

Beanie destroyed the Badgers for 3 TDs & an 8.0 avg last year...FIND OUT IF GREGGY G THINKS IT WILL HAPPEN AGAIN

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 20-14 ATS...59%
NCAA: 9-2 - NFL: 5-8 - Teasers: 6-4 - Hotties: 146-0
If u want to see my NCAA Pick & Ladies for Saturday CLICK HERE

Usually it's a good thing when someone says you look tight...

...but for the Cubs, they can't look tight again tonight w/ Billingsley on the mound. BTW, can't believe LA is +150...tough not to take if I wasn't from Chi-town!

On the Southsider tip, just like our friends...it's all bout teamwork! As I mentioned yesterday, if Javier wins today...we goin Sizzler before Round 2.

With that, let's check out some more NCAA Football action...

...the hero from Beaverland Jaquizz is on the docket!

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 20-14 ATS...59%
NCAA: 9-2 - NFL: 5-8 - Teasers: 6-4 - Hotties: 221-0

After waxing a cocky USC squad, the Beavers easily covered again last night for yours truly...too bad I couldn't enjoy it!

While I should have been celebrating after winning the 1st part of my NCAA teaser as the Moose Knuckles rolled last night (Beavers +17.5), the Windy City sports vibe has me more depressed than when I realized my Debbie Does Dallas CD had a fatal scratch. And even before we even arrived at playoff baseball yesterday, the Bears announced the once great Tommie Harris was suspended for missing a rehab stint to deal with one of the common traits among Chicago Bears...little tikes out of wedlock. Even more disturbing was Lance Briggs comment to the media that Tommie knows what to do, and if he doesn't...he can just ask me (or my fellow white LBer).

I know seeing this could be tempting Tommie, but that doesn't mean you don't wear a hat or pull the goalie!

How quickly the Bears DT has fallen. The jovial manchild was considered by many as the most dominate interior lineman by the start of his 2nd season, but after numerous injuries and taking lesson from Brian Urlacher on how to alienate a fandom trying to luv you, he leads my list of Chicago athletes needing a new address.

Since Oz has the look way too often w/ Javy on the mound...

I agree with her, we should've had a REAL starting pitcher to open this playoff series!

Starting on the Southside, while I wasn't suprised Javier Jazquez was treated like a mail-order bride yesterday (since Javy was the 1st pitcher in 25 years to open a playoff series with 16 losses and had pitched like shiznit recently), the fact the Sox continue to discuss how a 32 year-old needs to mature on the mound and stop losing concentration is like being suprised Heather Locklear has mental issues after spending her entire hot-azz life dating degenerate rockers. Adios Javier...don't let the Camaro door hit you in the azz on the way out!

I started to sour on Double Play Derek after this effort!

As for the Cubbies, this is tough to stomach cause I've always liked the guy, but no matter how solid Derek Lee's numbers look, he's about as clutch as my azz the first time lil Greggy G got lucky...I barely had my Zubaz down before I lost my swimmers! Please end the madness & depression I feel when D-Lee grounds into another DP (btw, DP is somwhat overrated unless both objects are mine) or swings at low outside slider...trade him for a Lee that actually has some confidence!

With that, I give you my alternative list of favorite Lee's!

The always lucky and confident Hyori Lee, or...

Jennifer Nicole Lee and her confident smile, or

My fav & proven winna Miss Korea Honey Lee!

And speaking of trading a Cubbie for someone else...

Kosuke fans now have his handband around their necks!

Maybe there's a chance we can trade him for...

...another Fukudome...that is Fukudome Yuko!

Alrighty, enough depressing sports banter! Time 2 jump back 2 the ATS Wonderland of Greggy G...and hotties of course!

Hey T-Bone, this is how us southern hotties roll Shocker Style, do ya wanna play!!!

College Pigskin Record:
Single ATS: 10-10 Parlays: 1-2 Teasers: 2-4

Good morning fellas, we are now into what I call ‘the real deal’ as far as college football goes. It is the first weekend in October my friends, when many teams are just beginning conference play, yet others like the ‘Sconsin Badgers have their season on the line. But one thing is for sure, October is perfect tailgating weather.

I luv a lady that can hold her own....

As for me, I’m jumping out of my skin this weekend cuz I’m gonna be one of those tailgaters. On the slate today….East Lansing where I will get to see first hand just how good the Iowa Hawkeye’s rush defense is. And yes, I will have some coin on it just cuz I am the degenerate that you think I am, but I ain’t gonna recommend it to anyone. C’mon Vegas, do you really think 2 teams relying on their backs and with equally stout defenses are both gonna drop 20+?? Ooops, did I say too much….

Wrong ball you say, I think this tailgater will take on any type of ball that comes her way. It brings a whole new meaning to back door!

And since I am watching a Hawk game today, you can be guaranteed that if you patiently read my picks word for word and stare at each sweater kitten for at least 15 seconds, you will get a Hawk Girl sighting as a reward….God I luv Herky pasties!!!

While my homey Greggy G is licking his Chicago playoff wounds, he continues to pound the pigskin with authority, to check out his Buckeye Luv, CLICK HERE.

Dear Auburn, let her light the way!

Auburn -4 @ Vanderbilt

I absolutely drool......

To go straight to my Sunday Funday pick, CLICK HERE, but trust me, it ain't as fun as the whole ride!!!

The question of the day...who falls on their head today?

NFL Pigskin Record:
ATS: 5-3 Parlays: 0-1 Teasers: 2-0

Let me start today by stating one simple thing….I hate the SEC!!! For the 2nd week in a row I put all of my faith(and my cabbage) on the east side of the nation, and the bottom line is that they have left me crying in the shower like I just went down on a she-male. But I’m not worried, cuz Sunday Funday continues to show me the way and makes sure that I can take my baby mama somewhere other than Mickey D’s.

When I take my lady out for some fine dining, the after dinner treat is always to my liking!

And one of the reasons the NFL has been so good is cuz I’ve rode my homey Greggy G like a rented mule. This weekend he has already banked on Ohio State, cleaned up on an Oregon St/Texas Tech teaser, and now has much luv for the Sunday Bucaneers(CLICK HERE TO READ UP!)

Don't cry, the Cubbies still have a bright future!

Before I dive into my pick of the day, I have to make a statement to my fan base that has more Cubbies shirts than button downs. Disappointment is inevitable, and they did just waste an opportunity at something great, but lets not forget that they have made the playoffs 2 straight years, and by dominating the regular season they have shown that they talent in the dugout. Pinella is the right answer for them, he is proven and will continue to build this team going into next year. All I ask is that as a Cubs fan you don’t get jumpy, support the team and support the coach as they build for next year, cuz I’ve been a Cubbies fan for many years and I like what I’ve seen the last few years!

I know you came for football, so pretend you're astro-turf and dig in!

Now that I have neatly folded my Cubbies shirt and put it in the bottom drawer until April, lets get to the Pigskin Pros.

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 23-14 ATS...62%
NCAA: 10-2 - NFL: 6-8 - Teasers: 7-4 - Hotties: 341-0
My NCAA Pick...My Teaser Pick...My NFL Pick...I'm frickin good

Your my boy Sage, but what the F*ck were you thinkin'?

While my alma mater had a horrible weekend as Iowa State pissed away a 20-0 halftime lead to #16 Kansas & Sage Rosenfels followed it up with the biggest choke I’ve ever witnessed, I selfishly had a phenomenal 3-0 ATS weekend…and saw the most bizarre Chicago bar scene Saturday Night as the Cubbies crapped down their leg.

I saw plenty of Cub fans Saturday that could've used a therapy session on this chair!

The Cubbie faithful wandered around the watering holes like Zombies and I swear I saw double-digits females crying. On the Southside, thanks to Dwayne “Babe Ruth” Wise, the Sox should even the series today, but heading down to the Trop for Game 5 seems like a tough task to handle. As for what else I saw this weekend…

Nobody is more fun to watch than Mr. Crabtree!

The Red Raiders have the best football player in the country in WR Michael Crabtree. While he’s not the tallest, strongest, or fastest, nobody in college has the natural instincts to make the right move every single time…with or without the ball in his hands. After making 134 catches for 1962 yards & 22 TDs as a freshman, Crabtree has become an even better player this season as he’s developed into a dominate blocker for Tech’s emerging ground game. Call me crazy, but for some reason I don’t think they’ll pull their annual 2nd half collapse & will head to Oklahoma on Nov. 22 undefeated.

She has the same look Marinelli had yesterday!

The Detroit Lions are the worst team I’ve ever seen in the NFL. Watching their head coach Rod Marinelli stare-up at the clock every single time his squad botches another play is beyond hilarious and I swear he looks like my old High School janitor. If he’s not fired by next week there should be a frickin investigation!

I think she's pissed because she listened to me & bet the top of her swimsuit the Bears wouldn't win 8 games!

As for the Bears, I still don’t think they’re any good, but neither is anyone in their division. My bet of the Bears Unda 8 wins has me a little nervous, but lucky for me I’ve dominated this season like Rocco Siffredi in the Ass Collector and can afford a little hiccup! With that, let’s look at the MONDAY NIGHTER to see if yours truly can go a perfect 4-0 ATS this week…

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 24-14 ATS...63%
NCAA: 10-2 - NFL: 7-8 - Teasers: 7-4 - Hotties: 442-0
Congrats to me as Monday's victory capped a perfect 4-0 ATS Week!

All I want for Christmas is 2nd baseman Orlando Hudson!

First-off to the suprising Chicago Southsiders, CONGRATS...I never expected you’d make it this far! Not that I've given you some props, as constant pessimist...what the hell is gonna happen with those old softball sluggers for next year. As a fan of little guys on the diamond, watching Konerko, Thome, Griff, & Swish stumble around the bases is getting harder and harder to watch!

GM Kenny Williams needs to make sure we have more cats in the line-up with skinny little legs!

As for who I want, with Cabrera gone, Alexei shifting to SS, the 30-year old Hudson would be an absolutely perfect fit a 2B. Somewhat of a late bloomer, the veteran has seen his average raise in the past six season (107 games due to a wrist injury this year - .305/.367ob%) and won a Gold Glove in '06 & '07. As for CF, call me crazy, but a platoon of Jerry Owens & Brian Anderson reminds me of the cinematograph masterpiece Aurora Snow vs. Gauge...extremely underrated and filled with passion! As for what to do with Swish, while it'll be harder than my azz during scene 2 of Aurora Snow vs Gage to trade Konerko or Thome, one of those cats has got to go!

Greg Gamble's Tuesday Night Sun Belt Pigskin Breakdown

Someone tell me how she's not the Sun Belt Mascot!

In year’s past with only one game on the ATS docket, regardless of how much knowledge I had available my degenerate-azz would be playing this contest no matter what. And I ain’t gonna lie, after some late night research (in-between a little www.redtube.com) I was already to jump on the Troy St. bandwagon until I ventured to their athletic homepage. For some reason, the fact that the duel-threat So. QB Jamie Hampton is not a brother and is as pale as could be, made me think twice about risking my ridiculous Pigskin Record with more than 60 games to pick from this weekend.

J. Hampton made my list of guys I didn't know were white!

I know they’ve played the likes of Ohio St. & Oklahoma St and I should have noticed this before, but for some reason, the Saturday morning Bloody Marys and imitation-Vicodin have given me a false sense of confidence. It’s not that I’m scared of a white guy under center who likes to run the pill, but the fact that I broke down each of Troy’s games and pictured Mr. Hampton scrambling with a darker shade of pigment means maybe I don’t know everything I should about the Trojans. (BTW, 50/50 chance I change my mind by the time I finish writing this and invest some dollars on this game.)

Just like she seemed like the logical choice to win, Troy seems like the logical favorite. Guess what...she didn't win!?

While on paper this appears to be an easy win for Troy, the fact that Florida Atlantic was the experts pick as the conference champ and has struggled out the gate to a 1-4 record means their due…right? On the flipside, last season Troy’s bowl chances where destroying in their Sun Belt finale at home against FAU, so you have to expect the revenge factor should be off the charts tonight…right? Throw-in the ridiculous schedule thus far and having two weeks to prepare, and I was ready to head to the window last night until that damn picture of Jamie Hampton had me 2nd guessing my pick.

Suprisingly, Rusty Smith hasn't had too many celebrations this season...does that change tonight?

As for Owls optimism this season, with 6-5 Jr. Rusty Smith returning under center after an awesome performance in 2007 (3688 passing yards w/ 32 TDs & 9 INTs), nobody in the country could've predicted the Jacksonville native would be entering the 6th game of the season having completed less than 50% of passes with only 4 TD & 7 INT. All that being said, after playing on road against Texas, Michigan St., Minnesota, and Middle Tennessee St thus far (all losses), the home-cooking might be exactly what the doctor ordered…or maybe not. Do as you please, but this degenerate is taking the night off...even though I want to tease the Owls up to 10 with the unda!

While Greggy G is a self-proclaimed genius, I'll admit I've had my fair share of Fantasy Busts this season!

With that, after plenty of fan mail requesting info on my fantasy results thus far, I feel obliged 2 give u a lil break down of my squads…aka Spud Webb’s Pony & GST Warrior Zubaz

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 24-14 ATS...63%
NCAA: 10-2 - NFL: 7-8 - Teasers: 7-4 - Hotties: 448-0

While some of you would like to talk about the car accident Carlos Marmol was in (he's ok) or how you wish Bob Howry was in the car instead...it's frickin Football Season!!!

While u guys try 2 MACK on this, I'm breakin' down the MAC!

GREG GAMBLE'S SATURDAY PIGSKIN PICKS
*if you'd rather check-out my Georgia/Tennessee Pick CLICK HERE

W. MICHIGAN BRONCOS @ BUFFALO BULLS (-1)
After traveling to #3 Missouri (L 42-21) and missing a FG as time expired at MAC favorite C. Michigan (L 27-25), Coach Turner Gill and the (2-3) Bulls received a much needed weekend off to regroup. In only his 2nd season at Buffalo, Gill shocked the league as the perennial doormat finished with a 5-3 conference record last season and was named MAC Coach of the Year. This season, Gill returned 18 starters, including Sr. leader Drew Willy (’08: 1299 yards, 64%, 12 TD, 3 INT), arguable the best back in the MAC James Starks (6-2, 215 lbs), and home run threat WR Naaman Roosevelt (34 catches, 15.2 avg, 4 TDs).

James Starks is healthy a due for breakout performance!

While their record hasn’t excited Vegas (which is a good thing), the Bulls haven’t lost at home this season and only lost once last year at home during conference play. And at Missouri three weeks ago playing without RB James Starks (who’s played since then and is healthy this week), Gill’s squad only trailed the Tigers by 6 late in the 3rd before their defense simply wore down...and that won't happen this week!

The Bulls should be well rested after a week off!

As for the (5-1) Broncos who look extremely formable on paper, considering their wins have come at the hands of N. Illinois, Idaho, Tennessee Tech, Temple, & Ohio, let’s not start sucking their Willy just yet (how clever is my azz with “Willy” leading the way for Buffalo…I’m frickin gifted!) Led by gunslinger Tim Hiller (19 TD & 4 INT) and RB Brandon West (574 yards, 5.6 avg), W. Michigan hasn’t had a weekend off since their season opener and the last time they hit the road only managed 7 points against Temple. While Hiller has been great this season, he’s one-dimensional, which bodes well for a Bulls squad that looked great vs. the pass against conference MVP Dan LeFevour…but struggled to contain his legs in a 2-point road loss. Look for the trip to Buffalo to cause some sloppiest early for the beat-up Broncos as the rested and disciplined Bulls treat this game as season changer.

With the game not starting until 3:30, the Buffalo fans should have time to recover from the night before!

And finally, and possibly most importantly, the Buffalo Bulls starting small forward on their basketball squad is named Greg MFin Gamble…no joke. And while yours truly spent his collegiate days telling sorority girls he had three balls in his undercarriage & brought a roulette wheel to keg parties, I have a feeling the Bulls Mr. Gamble will make sure the crowd is riled-up for a victory on Saturday…Game on BEEATCHES!

Final Score: BRONCOS 23 BULLS 30

Want more Loverly Ladies & Georgia/Tennessee ATS Luv?

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 24-14 ATS...63%
NCAA: 10-2 - NFL: 7-8 - Teasers: 7-4 - Hotties: 518-0
For Thursday Night's play Touch Me - For Saturday's play Touch Me
...or just keep reading for my NFL Sunday Funday Bears Special!

The Bears might be in trouble Sunday…and I'm blaming Roy!

One of the most ridiculous trends I dug-up this season is how horrific teams play offensively following their date/win against Detroit. Opponents average 37 ppg against the pathetic lil Lions, but the following week, those teams average a measly 14 ppg…and did I mention they’ve lost each and every one of those games?!

Her whip-cream friend could light-up the Lions!

Sorry, didn't mean to post Ali twice...my fault!

Just like having your 1st bump-n-grind experience w/ a slutty chick tryin' to gain your attention, and then following it up by dating a prude that acts like it tickles when you touch her ova her jeans…suddenly you don’t fell like Casanova anymore. The stats are so staggering you have to believe teams are overconfident after dismantling a defensive that would struggle to stop a John Moxon led West Canaan Coyotes squad.

After running ova the Lions for 34 points to open the season, ATL only scored 9 points at Tampa the following week!

While I believe Chicago's defense has the ability to buck the losing trend, their young offense might be in for a culture shock…and not only because the Falcons have been fierce up-front, but because of the noise & hype in Hot-Lanta. From all reports, Lovie’s squad received more cheers last week than Kitna’s crew as the crowd had more fun mocking a team that might be the only NFL or NCAA squad better suited having not fired Marty Mornhinweg…and that’s not a compliment Marty. As a result, I’m heading to the ATS window w/ this lil gem…

Just like her idea with the candles, I expect the passion to be much crazier in the Hot-Lanta Dome!

CHICAGO BEARS @ ATLANTA FALCONS (unda 43.5)
Two teams many gurus, including yours truly, thought would struggle to reach six wins face-off for a Sunday Funday battle with playoff implications. While the artist formerly know has Krazy “Drunk on the Internet” Kyle seems to have matured into a legitimate NFL QB, my guess is Ron Turner dials down the offense in the loud-azz Georgia Dome and keeps the ball in Forte’s hands. With two powerful rushing attacks, field-position will be huge on Sunday so expect the clock to be rolling twice as fast as normal…perfect for an unda play!

While the Falcons run game is extremely solid, this proves anything can be contained with a lil effort!

While Michael The Bowling Ball Burner Turner has been a game changer and Jerious Norwood is a perfect compliant, the Bears rank 4th in the NFL against the rush and do not allow many big plays (longest run allowed – 25 yards). The scariest aspect of the Falcons offense has been the deep-play threats of Roddy White & Michael Jenkins after teams have been lulled to sleep by the run. Luck for Chicago, with the big pulsating-brain of Mike Brown running the show in the secondary, I’m confident they’ll keep those two speedsters in-front of them.

When's the next time we'll actually see this on a return?

And finally, while special teams always is an ova/unda killa, Devin Hester doesn’t seem to be the same threat in the return game. Don’t get me wrong, he’s still capable of the HR, but he's been a lil tentative of late & might be concentrating more on his WR-play. Considering the monetary incentives he receives for catching the pigskin, maybe the reckless abandon he ran w/ in the past has been tempered. As for ATL, they’ve yet to return a kick/punt for a TD & rank dead last in punt return average. I know, I know…my analysis is sick so feel free to tell your friends about the legend that is Greggy MFin G!

Final Score: FALCONS 20 BEARS 17

As for the Thursday Night's battle between Clemson & Wake Forest, you know how I luv to breakdown great athletes! (touch me here)

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 24-15 ATS...62%
NCAA: 10-3 - NFL: 7-8 - Teasers: 7-4 - Hotties: 628-0
For my NFL Play Touch Me - For Saturday's plays Touch Me

U frickin' suck! The only thing you've designed well in ur life is named Lauren (Bowden)...I recommend a google search!

As for our friend Ms Campo, she's teasing us and wearing Cardinal colors. I guess that means...

...were teasin' Hunter & L'ville down to minus -1 tonight!

Considering she likes to have fun at night, maybe I should tell her who I'm teasing them with...

Looks like a party is about to break out my friends!!

College Pigskin Record:
Single ATS: 11-12 Parlays: 1-2 Teasers: 3-4

Thanks for tuning in to Insideplays.com today, make sure that you grab that cocoa and schnapps before you sit down fellas, cuz there ain’t nuttin’ better than starting a Saturday off with coeds, cocoa, and the dynamic duo of T-Bone & Double G!!

I can provide the coeds, and naughty ones at that, it is up to you to provide the cocoa! Mmmm, spankalicious.

Before we get into why today is gonna be a great day for Teasin’ T-Bone, you have got to check out where my homey Greggy G is spreadin’ his luv today. And much like a short skirt wearing, spagetti strap totin' sexy coed in the corner of the bar, he even provides you a lil tease as well. TOUCH GREGGY RIGHT HERE!

To tease or not to tease, that is the question....

If you didn’t already notice, I’d like you to scroll back up to the top and check out my ATS record….yep, you got it, not quite .500. I point this out cuz I’ve only grabbed one mark in the win column out of my last 7 picks, and I’m a man that believes in trends, with my biggest belief being that trends change. So today is going to be the today that my trend changes, partially cuz the sun shines on a dogs ass some day, but primarily cuz I have done a deep dive into some of the not-so-prominent conferences and found some interesting matchups.

Living proof that good things are bound to happen when you open up doors that you normally wouldn't touch!!

So here we go, and if you need a refill already, just consider yourself a friend of mine….

NFL Pigskin Record:
ATS: 5-4 Parlays: 0-1 Teasers: 3-0
For Greg Gamble’s NFL pick of the day, Touch Me

At least we still have the ladies when the college boyz let us down. Thanks for the disappointment Arizona St, LSU, Auburn, Michigan, Wisconsin, etc.

Week 6 of this fine NFL pigskin season moves me to chat about two topics…facts and trends. I’m gonna spill some knowledge on you that will give you a feel for why I do what I do, but the beautiful part is that after it all you can simply say…T-Bone, you’re one of the coolest guys I know, but your still full of shit. So lets dig in and see if we can walki away with some lettuce.

This guy takes Sunday Funday to a whole new level!

Lets first break it down by home dogs and home favorites. The home dogs have only covered 36% of the time in the last 3 weeks, while the favorites have covered 51% of the time. That leads me to pretty much ignore anyone who is a home favorite for right now. When you look even deeper, those home dogs from even to +5 have only covered 29% of the time, +5 to +10 is 33% of the time, and over +10 is 100%(only one game, I believe the Fins/Pats if my memory serves me correctly, damn bong resin).

Time to look in the mirror and see if u like what u see!

So I am gonna focus in on any game that has the home team between even and +10. Today brings us 3 games….Falcons +3.5 against the Bears, 49ers +5.5 against the Eagles, and the Cardinals +5.5 against the Cowboys. There is a fourth on Monday w/ the Browns +8.5 against the Giants, so keep your eyes peeled on the action today to give you a feel for tomorrow(remember it is all about trends!!) So one of the 3 games is going to have the home team cover if the trend continues, which I think it will.

Home whites and home dogs, only in football is it a bad thing...maybe straps and fishnet would help!

In my mind the Falcons have the best chance of covering cuz they are 2-0 at home and have a ground game that puts up nearly 200 yds/game, so they can control the game and the crowd on their own turf. The Cardinals are 2-0 at home as well, however they have an aging QB and running back that are both going to run out of steam soon, and Boldin is on the sideline with a head injury, oh yeah, they also play the Cowboys who are 3 points short of a perfect season.

But the game I like the most.....

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 26-17 ATS...61%
NCAA: 10-4 - NFL: 8-8 - Teasers: 8-5 - Hotties: 644-0
To skip to my Monday Night ATS Pick (ur missin' out) Touch Me Here

Before we roll to my Monday Night Extravaganza, let’s hit-up a few weekend thoughts to get those hazy brains of my loyal degenerates fired-up (BTW, good riddance to Clemson's Tommy Bowden…you’ve cost my kids at least a year of college ova the years!):

What, u pointing at ur monstrous overpriced contract Tommie?

Bears Coaching Staff treated like a Newbie in Van Nuys, CA
To start, while the unda play was closer than I would’ve liked, I’ll take an ATS victory anyway I can get it...not counting playing catcher for my book As for the craziness in Hot-Lanta, the first move that had me screaming at the TV was Lovie’s decision to go-for-it on 4th & goal down two scores with half a quarter to play. I know the Bears somehow made it work as the Falcons forgot how to run-out the clock & Kyle “Joe Montana” Orton continued his unexpected march to Canton, but how do you make that call still needing another score? I don’t care what you tell me…it’s almost as idiotic as Marty Mornhinweg’s decision to kick-off after winning the toss in OT a few years back.

Hey Robbie G, I bet (legally of course) she could have performed a better squibber in her shoes than ur azz!

Secondly, the sports-radio hatred regarding the squib kick doesn’t hold much weight in my bloodshot eyes. The problem was not the decision, but Robbie “As good as Gould…except on squibbers” execution. Instead of lasering a chopper to a vacant spot, just like when I play kickball with the neighbor kids when their parents are watching, he basically just hit a lazy dribbler directly to WR Harry Douglas (BTW, does it make me a loser that every time I hear “Harry Douglas” I laugh like a lil schoolgirl? BTW2, when the neighbor kid’s parents aren’t watching, I riffle it like Tony Meola and hustle them for every last Ju-Ju Bee!). Don’t blame Lovie Homeboys, blame the MFin kicker!

While Matt Ryan's ball sailed like a pretty bird, how the hell did the Bears not expect the Falcons to run that route?

And finally, the Bears defensive scheme on the final play was beyond horrendous. The only chance the Falcons had was for a 30-yard out, but for some reason there wasn’t a Bear anywhere near that extremely predictable sideline pattern. I’ll even support the crazy-azz fans that wanted a DB to “chuck” or attempt to receive a holding penalty after a few seconds rolled off the clock, rather than provide no-pass rush and instruct the secondary to play against the Hail Mary. While my victory on the unda tempered my anger, let’s just say Lovie’s decisions might be the reason the Bears fail to make the playoffs…and at least gives me a chance on my unda 8 wins on Chicago’s season.

Maybe you should have spent the last 7 years practicing something else Mr. Clipboard?

Matt Cassell’s worse for the Pats D than the O
Put a frickin fork in the Pats playoff chances! I know they’ve been out in Caly longer than a former Community College girl who’s trying the Hollywood scene after some convincing from a talent scout to try plastic implants, but last night’s performance confirmed what many of us already knew…substituting a HS starter for Gisele’s boy-toy makes a world of difference...even for the Socrates of Coaching (BTW, I luv how the Hooded-Wonder’s smug-smirk has transformed into the look of a former Prom King’s distain for a computer-geek stepson.) Without Brady the offense is no longer controlling the tempo or forcing opponents to play catch-up, and as a result, the defense no-longer looks like savvy veterans and simply looks AARP old. Not only are the old-geezers spending more time on the field, but they’ve been forced to stop the run past the 1st quarter.

While I'd be happy if I was Tom Brady and had to stay at home, I don't think Vrabel, Bruschi, & Seau are?

Last season, the Patriots would jump-out to an early led and force the opponents into a pass-happy attack, which enabled the linebackers to use their experience to confuse opposing QBs with unique blitz schemes and coverage drops. Now, with Cassell looking more overwhelmed than a virgin at the Playboy Mansion and unable to move the chains, teams can exploit NE's young secondary early in the game and utilize a power rushing attack late to cripple their aging LBs. As for the genius of Mr. Belichick, let’s just say without Bundchen’s bump-n-grind mate he’s looking more like the coach that was sub-.500 before the Wolverine took over the reigns of his teams.

While he's already a superstar in the Track world...

...he's quickly becoming a superstar on the gridiron!

Baylor’s FR QB will be a Heisman Winner before leaving Waco
The 6-3 son of a retired Army sergeant, Robert Griffin enrolled in Baylor early after dominating the HS classroom like he does any surface of his choice. After spring football practice where he wrestled away the starting QB-job from 8th year & former Miami (FL) QB Kirby Freeman and last year’s starter Jr. Blake Szymanski, while most HS seniors were tying to convince underclassman to bump-uglies at prom Griffin ran track for the Unviristy…and what do you know, the cat finished 3rd in the 400-hurdles at the NCCA Outdoor track championship.

Just like her, I'm guessin' Griffin looks just as nice on sand!

As for the pigskin, early this season Griffin looked like the former Hokie & Dog-hating Ronny Mexico with his legs as an absolutely perfect fit for Art Briles's spread-style offense. This weekend, following a 102 2 TD rushing performance against Oklahoma, Iowa State was geared to stopping the phenom & forced the Copperas Cove native to put the ball in the air. The result…a Bears 38-10 victory as Griffin was 21-24 for 278 yards, 2 TD, 0 INT & barely made an attempt to run the pill. Before you call me crazy for predicting a Heisman victory by 2010, watch the magician on gridiron…it’s Must MFing See TV!

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 26-18 ATS...59%
NCAA: 10-4 - NFL: 8-8 - Teasers: 8-6 - Hotties: 682-0

I can't decide...either Marvin's laughing cause he can't believe he still has a job or cause he actually convinced the owner Cedric Benson will help them turn the corner?

Considering I have Tony Romo and Randy Moss on the same fantasy squad, maybe I should just let Marvin Lewis coach my sorry-azz bunch once he's fired next week. As for what jumped off the page at me like silicone magic from the plastic surgeon gods bouncin' on a lovely trampoline, let’s take a peak silly Homeboys:

Just like when Jarah's feeling good...

...when Andre Johnson's 100% there ain't no one better!

Complimented by a 6-3 WR (Kevin Walter) running precise routes with softer hands than a Filipino Mail-Order Masseuse, the underrated downfield abilities of TE Owen Daniels, and two solid backs (Slaton & Green), I'm convinced Matt Schaub will have the Texans back in the playoff race by mid-November considering their next two home dates are with the Lions & Bengals followed by a trip to the Metrodome!

U think the Lions will have a lil Captain in them on this road-trip...it's not like it can make things any worse!

Considering Detroit lost a heartbreaker down the road in Minny and have another week of catcalls from the fans, media, and their mothers, my guess is the road-trip down to Houston could turn into a disaster. How much u wanna bet a few of Rod BOOBinelli’s boys have a lil too much fun Saturday Night after curfew? Throw-in a Texans squad pumped after their 1st win of the season, and I see the Texans (-6) blowing-out the Lions on Sunday. As for what else I like…

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 26-18 ATS...59%
NCAA: 10-4 - NFL: 8-8 - Teasers: 8-6 - Hotties: 691-0
If u want 2 skip my NFL Banter & checkout my NCAA Picks Touch Me

With Roy Williams out of Rod BOOBinelliville and onto Dallas, the underrated Crayton might not have anybody around him!

For all the clamoring Jerry Jones grabbed another head-case, gave-up too many draft picks, and immediately overpaid for the former Longhorn, nobody can dispute that the 6-3 playmaker makes Dallas a whole lot better. And after 5 years of listening to Matt Millen, Marty Mornhinweg, Rod BOOBinelli, and John Kinta, do you blame the 26 year-old for wanting out of the NFL embarrassment known as the Lions that sported a 30% win-percentage ova his 5 year career?

Brad Johnson has more options for his old arm than Hefner did when these three were still roaming the Mansion!
(Check back tomorrow to see what his new twins look like Homeboys...now that's what we call a teaser baby!)

In only his 3rd season in Motown, Williams snagged 82 balls, scored 7 TDs, ranked 3rd in receiving yards 1310 yards (16.0 ypc) and made the Pro Bowl…don’t you think that’s a lil better than Patrick Crayton?

Let's not forget, just a few years back Mr. Elbow Pad won a Super Bowl for Chucky and the Bucs!

While his on & off-field antics have been extremely juvenile, my guess is we’ll see a new & improved Williams on his best behavior (at least for awhile) and help Dallas make the playoffs. With the explosive Marion Barber/Felix Jones backfield, a solid line, and three legit playmakers in the passing game with Witten, TO, & Roy (not to mention Barber & Jones in the flat), my guess is a savvy veteran like Brad Johnson might actually force O-Coordinator Jason Garrett to simplify the offense…something they should have done long ago.

While some worry Johnson might wear down, plenty of people still look solid when they're tired!

Call me crazy, but while Jessica Simpson’s Box ‘O Stardom and fans of flag-football heroics might be pissed about Romo’s broken digit, don’t be surprised to see the Cowboys play more consistently ova the next few weeks with the elbow-padded vet under center.

Don't worry Pacman fans...he'll be back someday!

I'm totally shocked Adam Jones was suspended again…never saw this one coming Homeboys! Seriously, forcing a cat to Make It Rain at his house while sippin on a Fresca is like my girl asking me to stop calling Sharky on Gamedays and soaking my Cheerios with a White Russian! He’ll be back…and he’ll still be good!

I have two QBs that'll be tougher to contain than these two!

Onto the ATS action, and not to anyone’s surprise, but once Vegas got a hold of my Houston Texas prediction yesterday they jacked the spread up to -9. While I’m still a fan of the play, look for my final NFL ATS picks on Thursday to see if I can't find something better for ya. Worse case scenario, Andre Johnson & Co. will be teased down to -3 for a couple plays. With that, let’s take a peak at some College ATS action upcoming and make our reservations for Sizzler…

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 26-18 ATS...59%
NCAA: 10-4 - NFL: 8-8 - Teasers: 8-6 - Hotties: 702-0

When I heard Florida St. was playing 2night I got excited!

But then I found out she had other plans...what a tease!

Call my a BEEATCH all you want, but if you bet 1 million on each of my teaser plays this year the ATS Fairy would’ve left an extra 1.4 million unda your pillow! As for my crazy decision to roll tonight’s college match-up with the professional pigskin, tell me the bloody won’t taste extra special Sunday morning knowing the lowly Lions are on the road and only getting a FG...Texans roll baby!

GREG GAMBLE'S NCAA/NFL TEASER SPECIAL
If you want my ATS plays for Saturday (Touch Me Here)

Is much easier to catch the pill when you're 6'6"!

FLORIDA ST. SEMINOLS (teased -5) @ NC ST. WOLFPACK
DETROIT LIONS @ HOUSTON TEXANS (teased -3)

Just like Rich “Be Patient” Rodriguez, new headmaster Tom O’Brien inherited a squad last year he wanted to completely revamp. Unfortunately, the incoming recruits did not match those in Ann Arbor and O’Brien had to wait until this year to start the chant of “Here Come The Freshmen!” And unlike the happy faces & willys from fraternity row when the inexperienced sorority kittens are introduced, football in the ACC doesn’t have the same welcoming party for the newbies. After playing QB carousal simply to appease the mojo of the upperclassmen, O’Brien has finally handed the reigns to the 19 year-old playmaker Russell Wilson…and you have to be a playmaker when your only 5-11!

O'Brien might not show his face after another home loss!

While Wilson has made few plays and actually moved the ball two weeks ago against Boston College (maybe that had something to do with O’Brien knowing a lil something about the Boston College defense?), the Seminoles have had two weeks to scheme for the rook and should cause all kinds of problems considering the Wolfpack run the ball as well as Matt Stairs swipes a base (2.5 ypc). As for how this game compares to Megan Fox…

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 26-18 ATS...59%
NCAA: 10-4 - NFL: 8-8 - Teasers: 8-6 - Hotties: 711-0

BTW, I’m halfway home on my NCAA/NFL TEASER as the Seminoles covered last night, but if you missed it…no worries my degenerate friend. Simply tease one of your favorites w/ the Texans (-3 at home) and thank me later for the 6 free points…Houston rolls!

If you missed my Thursday Night College Teaser, don't worry...we have plenty more fun ahead for the weekend!

Considering most of you are diehard daily readers, I don’t need to tell you my NCAA ATS picks earlier this week were Ohio State -3 (paired with Buckeye red thong lingerie) & Memphis +9 (paired with tiny Tiger jean shorts) and simply owe you my Sunday Funday NFL selection:

Besides looking less like Silver Spoons star Rick Schroder, the Marshall kid also looks rejuvenated with the move to MIA!

BALTIMORE RAVENS @ MIAMI DOLPHINS (-3)
I honestly believe the last time I invested on the Dolphins as a favorite, my girl Gauge had not yet retired from the adult industry (I luv the cinematic classic Aurora Snow vs Gauge TOUCH ME HERE to find out more on Gauge). But just like how Cougars have unexpectedly started to excite me as the years have past, I’ve also fallen for the Wildcat offense in Miami. Especially with the extremely accurate arm of Chad Pennington offsetting their unique rushing attack, the Dolphins have actually been more balanced than people think (btw, checking out the riffle on Jake Delhomme, maybe Chad should opt for Tommy John surgery in the off-season regardless).

Just like our friend, the Tuna looks much better analyzing pigskin sitting in a chair than on the sideline!

But the biggest reason to believe in the Dolphins march to mediocrity are the fingerprints that have designed the roster. While 'The Big Tuna' brought in impact players that understand his style and plays the game the right way, for all the hatred I have for Nick Satan, the Bama headmaster is one the best coaches in the country and had his hands in the Miami cookie jar for a couple years bringing-in the top collegiate talent. As a result, the foundation of the Dolphins is extremely solid and should improve with each passing week.

While Ronnie Brown has been the playmaker, Ricky's hard inside running has been the catalyst for the Wildcat O!

While the simplicity of the Wildcat offense has thrown a loop to opposing defenses (let’s put are two best runners in the backfield and not waste anytime having a slow white dude hand-off the pill), some cats forget Ronnie Brown was actually having a Pro Bowl-type season before tearing his ACL last year. Almost a year removed, Brown’s averaging a solid 4.7 per carry and actually looks fresher late in games with Ricky Williams sharing the load (60 carries so far for Smokey). While Ricky’s numbers probably hasn't impressed the novice handicappers, averaging about 4 yards a carry in the trenches has been the reason Ronnie has found nice holes outside the tackles.

Staying on the chair theme, just like Miami's unique offense, sitting in a chair the unconvential way can still be effective!

I know Ray-Ray & the veteran Ravens D leads the league in yards allowed per game, but considering their first four contests were against Cincy, Cleveland, Pittsburgh, & Tennessee…let’s just say I expect them to drop with each passing week & to wear down as the season rolls on. While Baltimore has stuffed the traditional power-rushing attacks, the collegiate twist Miami has added might lead to some big plays Sunday. On the outside, while nobody could identify WR Greg Camarillo (21 catches) on the street and speedster Ted Ginn Jr. & Hawaii’s former vacuum Davone Bass are averaging under 10 ypc, the offense calls for quick patterns on the outside to loosen things up for their underrated TEs down the middle (Anthony Fasano 15 rec, 13.9 ypc – David Martin 12 rec, 13.5 ypc) as opponents LOAD-UP IN THE BOX (someone call Vivid Entertainment, I think I have new movie title!). Especially with the entire secondary for the Ravens banged-up (Samari Rolle & Dawan Landry – Out, Ed Reed – Questionable, & Chris McAlister – Probable), look for the Thundering Herd Homeboy to find plenty of openings & improve on an already impressive 69 comp%.

As for the Ravens offense and how they match some of my Lovely Ladies...Here's the skinny TOUCH ME HERE for more ATS Magic!

College Pigskin Record:
Single ATS: 12-13 Parlays: 1-2 Teasers: 3-5
To Check out Greg Gamble's 10-4 ATS college picks & thongs

Grab a drink and keep readin', cuz this is just the beginning! U can't beat Bama Poon!

Road dogs, my friends, today is about the road dogs across the nation. And the reason the traveling team is high on my list is because of math. Because today isn’t just about any team that has donned a bus or plane today, today is about the dogs that come into today less than +5. These teams are at the top of my radar cuz on the year, any home team that has been from a pick ‘em to -5 has only covered 28% of the time.

I'm thinkin' she still covers better than homes teams have been throughout the 2008 campaign!

So this weekend brings us 8 games where the home team is even to -5. If the trend continues only 2 of these home teams will cover, not bad odds huh? But let me tell you a secret that only the insideplay cult will know….TCU(at -1.5) already covered on Thursday. That leaves 7 games and now only one team is expected to cover to keep the 28% trend alive. Hell, even go one more and say the trend is going to be 40% this weekend(which has only happened twice so far), that still means that only 2 out of the 7 home teams that are even to -5 are gonna cover today.

Vanessa doesn't like to cover either, the correlation is impeccable. To see more of the dirty girl that goes by Vanessa, gently STROKE HER HERE!

Those 7 games are….UConn/Rutgers(-1), Wisconsin/Iowa(-3.5), Purdue/Northwestern(-4), Southern Miss/Rice(-2), Kansas St/Colorado(-3.5), Virginia Tech/Boston College(-3), and Mizzou/Texas(-5). Out of all of these games, I believe Wisconsin had the best chance of winning today…

NFL Pigskin Record:
ATS: 6-4 Parlays: 0-1 Teasers: 4-0

The hogs up front don't get much luv...

Sunday Funday Beatches!! I want to start by saying thank you to our loyal insideplays.com fanatics, our relationship may be straining, but remember, for richer or poorer. As for the college pigskin, all I can say is that Saturdays have treated me about as well as most males treated Jenny McCarthy after they found out she got hepatitis from that boxer guy back in the ‘90’s.

But when the hogs are attached to a face like that, people start lookin'! Nice work young Tebow.

The NFL contingency have been much more consistent, and between Dr Gamble and I we are bringin’ home the bacon to finish out the weekends.
To check out Greggy’s fetish with aquatic animals, CLICK HERE!
To check out Double G’s luv for southern girls, TOUCH ME!

A Jets fan, and she luvs the flag pole, NICE!!

NY Jets -3 @ Oakland

It has been pretty clear early on what kind of a difference having a solid QB like.....

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 28-20 ATS...58%
NCAA: 11-5 - NFL: 8-9 - Teasers: 9-6 - Hotties: 722-0
Greggy G's results this week: 2-2 ATS with Denver +3 tonight!

It's Black n White boys...unlike Dicky Belichick, I've been w/out her boyfriend for years & still have a winning record!

From the evil-hatred that entered my cell phone yesterday, I guess .500 ATS for the weekend is unacceptable considering my status in the Handicapping World….c'mon my friends, give me a break, I still have the Broncos tonight to push me into the green. And don’t blame my azz cause ur unwilling to tease. From what I've heard...Money, Women and Teasin' make the world go round. Actually, considering my record without Tom Brady is 28-20 while Coach Gym Sweatshirt is 40-66 without Gisele’s Boyfriend, I apologize to nobody.

Somewhere along the way this cat morphed from this...

...into this. Congrats Mr. Orton, you the shiznit!

Briefly on the Bears, congrats on the win and thanks for the entertaining drunk flag-football contest, but honestly…that was uglier than foreshadowing Pamela & Tommy’s saggy sex video at age 60. Even with the artist formerly known as Krazy Kyle looking more and more like a fringe Pro Bowler, if Brad Childress & the Vikings weren’t the most undisciplined self-destructive team in the league the Bears would’ve lost. That being said, with the lousy state of the division and a perfectly-placed Bye Week to revive the secondary, tough to see how they don’t battle with Green Bay till the very end...good luck

Just like Kate, no matter if he was wearing home or road colors tonight, I think Cutler's a picture perfect choice!

DENVER BRONCOS (+3) @ NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS
I know many gridiron gurus believe this stat is overhyped, but in my opinion, screw those fools…the great-Billy Belichick’s record is 16 games unda-.500 without Tommy B unda-center! For all the geniusness he supposedly possesses, nobody can convince me he’s actually better than the man coaching across the field tonight. Just like the smug Dicky B, Mike Shanahan has won a couple World Titles with a Hall of Fame QB, but unlike Bill “if you're not cheating, you're not trying” Belichick, he’s actually had plenty of playoff opportunities without one.

You might like this look...

...but I'd rather take this!

You also might think this is hot...

...but I'd rather give her the "Hotness" crown!

As a result, while I’ll give you some technical breakdowns on why the Broncos win outright a lil later, in the simplest form…Two solid coaches & teams, with one possessing a Pro Bowl-QB and the other a career clipboard-QB. I’ll delve deeper into how the Broncos-offense is more dangerous than Las Vegas during NBA All-Star Weekend and the Pats defense/age is not equipped to staying on the field because of a stagnate offense, but honestly, all you need to know is Cassell can’t hang with what the Broncos put on the board.

No disrespect, but Belichick without Brady kind of reminds me of Lindsay Lo without the fun party-girl act...

...just another red-head in a bathing suit!
For more Pats/Broncos Breakdowns & Bikinis...TOUCH ME HERE

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 28-21 ATS...57%
NCAA: 11-5 - NFL: 8-10 - Teasers: 9-6 - Hotties: 735-0
For tonight's Tuesday Night ATS Special...Touch Me Here

What can I say Dicky B, you the man & you played Greggy G like a fiddle...and Mr. Cassell, I'll eat some crow for ya.

While my NCAA play of Memphis was ruined on the first drive Saturday when their stud-QB went down for the game, I won't blame Culter's whacked finger (or the back-to-back opening drive fumbles that completely changed the tempo of the game) for my embarrassing ATS performance last night...Mea Culpa Homeboys, Mea MFin Culpa!

Considering Belichick kicked my azz, if he wants to trade in his grey Hoodie for this, you won't hear a peep from me!

As for the Tuesday Night Ohio/Temple ATS Pigskin battle...

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 29-21 ATS...58%
NCAA: 12-5 - NFL: 8-10 - Teasers: 9-6 - Hotties: 741-0
Hopefully you didn’t miss yesterday’s Tuesday Night Winner!

For some reason, everytime I see Mike Leach I think of the late-great Chris Penn with dark hair...am I wrong?

Around this time every year, Mike Leach's flashy squad loses to a BIG 12 powerhouse. Especially with the Red Raiders coming-off some weak victories against the rebuilding Cornhuskers (OT victory at home) and the suddenly-awful Aggies (down 3 at half before winning 43-25 in College Station), who in their warped & hazy mind would actually take the Red Raiders on the road to face the human-Blueberry this weekend?

Put the women, children, & sour cream to bed folks!

GREG GAMBLE'S EARLY WEEK ATS ASSESSMENT...
Just like my football, I luv things black, red, & flashy!

TEXAS TECH RAIDERS (-1) @ KANSAS JAYHAWKS
Graham Harrell has been an absolute machine completing 78% of his passes with 15 TD & only 2 INT the last 4 weeks. While the prognosticators will tell you last week’s 1st half performance against the downward-spiraling A&M squad should raise cause for concern, I was more impressed with how they came out after halftime on both sides of ball. The defense tightening-up and didn’t allow a point in the 2nd half, while the offense showed an ability to exploit some in-game match-ups with the senior leadership of the 6-3 Harrell.

This must be a sign...she reminds me of a Crabtree!

While WR Michael Crabtree is still the main attraction (51 catches & 12 TD) his numbers are down from last year because of the emergence of So. Detron Lewis (40 catches at 13.4 ypc), 6-3 Fr. Tramain Swindell (last week: 7 catches & 101 yards) and a two-headed rushing attack that actually rushes the pigskin this season adding some much needed balance (So. Baron Batch & Sr. Shannon Woods - 893 yards, 6.3 avg, & 12 TD)...as well as, 56 catches & 663 yards receiving!

I really hope Big Blue did this as a joke!

I know the Red Raider D is still considered “Oil-Tycoon on the Paris Hilton runway strip”-easy, but their “bend-but-don’t break toooo much” has really played well when the game’s been on the line. Especially with the stamina from a full season of running on-n-off the field all day, look for a much fresher group in the 2nd half as the Jayhawks start to feel the affects of last week’s bruising contest with the Sooners.

READ-ON ABOUT TEXAS TECH, KU, & BIKINIS

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 29-21 ATS...58%
NCAA: 12-5 - NFL: 8-10 - Teasers: 9-6 - Hotties: 744-0
Did you miss Tuesday's Winner? Did you see yesterday's ATS pick?

While I'm sure Coach Stewart (or as I call him Grandpa Stew) is a nice fellow & probably does a mean crossword puzzle, he doesn't resonate with ATS magic the way Richie did!

GREGGY G'S THURSDAY NIGHT ATS PREDICTION

Thursday Night football might be the best invention since the one-&-only Belly-Button Jewel of Love!

AUBURN TIGERS (+3.5) @ W. VIRGINIA MOUNTAINEERS
Prior to opening day, many felt this late season non-conference battle could play a major role in the BCS race. Now, another Tommy is on the hot-seat after a disastrous offensive scheme change backfired, while WV looks eerily similar to the ole Mountaineers before Rich Rodriquez arrived. But before jumping on the Tigers for their idiotic expectations that the spread-offense could be installed over the summer and lead them to a title, let’s talk about the coaching change in Morgantown that's making fans nervous.

Only Greggy G can compare the Mountaineers coaching transition with Jenna J's brilliant film career!

The Mountaineers offense under Grandpa Stew reminds me of Jenna Jameson’s performances once she started directing. While most of the pieces are still the same (plastic boobs compared to the starting QB returning), the overall quality lacks the edginess that made it special. Seriously, do remember the cinematic masterpiece “Jenna Loves Rocco” circa 1996…it had a Rich Rodriquez-type flair & passion to it. Then, in 2002 Lady Jameson decides to start producing her movies and the next you know “I Dream of Jenna” turns out to be dirty version of a Cinemax flick. Kinda like watching Pat White run the same scheme but with Grandpa Stewart as headmaster.

Four years of hits for lil Pat White have taken a toll!

In addition, is it me, or does 190-lb Pat White seem like he’s starting to feel the wear-n-tear of 4 years running off tackle. Especially without the safety net of Steve Slaton who could basically carry the squad when needed, the QB now relies on Noel Devine who just doesn’t have the same skill set to grind-out the tough yards. While Devine will be the fastest player on the field tonight & always is a HR-threat, the short yardage inabilities of both he & White have stalled drives all season…and that was against E. Carolina, Syracuse, & Rutgers. Did I mention White missed the Mountaineers last contest at home versus lowly Syracuse (who they narrowly beat) with a concussion?

While not this flawless, the Tiger D still is extremely solid!

And they can wrap-up with the best of 'em!

For all the turmoil in Auburn, the Tiger defense has been absolutely outstanding and will be huge upgrade from what the Mountaineers are used to seeing. Tuberville’s squad has a solid secondary, so look for them to load-up in the box to stop the run and trust their one-on-one coverage on the outside against WV’s unimpressive and undersized WRs. Also, I’m not trying to hate on Grandpa Stewart and I hear he’s a great guy who likes to do Sudoku puzzles and drink Iced Tea on the porch, but have you seen him on the sideline during important moments, drives, or plays? After first displaying a unique combination of nervousness & bewilderment, Stewart then stares up at the sky as if to say, “What Would Richie Do” aka WWRD!

While RB Ben Tate is a beast, don't forget about Brad Lester!

As for the Tigers attempt to reestablish their offense, READ ON!

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 29-22 ATS...57%
NFL: 8-10 - NCAA: 12-6 - Teasers: 9-6 - Hotties: 752-0
Just want my College ATS Pick - Just want my NFL ATS Pick

Even though the skinny Tuberville always walks tall, will he look this good when he's asked to leave stage right!

One Tommy (Bowden) gone and another Tommy (Tubberville) soon to be out the door. You remember what happened last time Greggy G lost on Thursday Night...yeah, that’s right, I pulled some strings and the next thing you know ESPN was reporting Clemson's looking for a new headmaster. My favorite last night, besides the leftover Pinot I dumped in my Diet Coke, was when the booth glorified Tubberville as a “River Boat Gambling”-guru after his kicker grabbed the on-side kick in the 1st half. Seriously guys? You know who usually calls plays like that…teams that can’t frickin’ move the ball on offense!

Did somebody put some happy shrooms in his medamucil, but he's gone from salty to silly & sassy overnight!?

Speaking of the booth, I don’t care if you can’t understand what he says or get distracted cause you can’t stop thinking about how much grandpa-spit is on Mark May’s stat sheets, Holtz is frickin’ hilarious! And I hated the salty coach & absolutely loved watching him lose back in the day. But now, he always seems like he just sipped an Old Fashioned and is giggling cause someone put Viagra & a whoopie cushion in his X-Mas stocking. About 15% of the time he gives some witty coaching BS, but not to worry, the other 85% he acts like a happy grandpa and spends the night mocking his ole coaching habits & trying to make May laugh…now that’s what I call a priceless ol geezer!

Alrighty, enough Coffee talk, time to hit-up the daily line specials for the weekend. Considering I already gave you Saturday’s ATS play, I just owe you my Sunday selection, as well as my personal fav…

TEASING FRIDAY NIGHT COLLEGE WITH NFL SUNDAY

There's something that always feels right about starting off the weekend w/ a Friday night college teaser!
*BTW, I'm off to Ames this weekend to watch two of the most disappointing teams in the Big 12...ISU & A&M. Someone please find my frickin' flask!

#12 BOISE ST. BRONCOS (teased -1) @ SAN JOSE ST SPARTANS
ATLANTA FALCONS @ PHILADELPHIA EAGLES (teased -2)

The Broncos have undoubtedly become the most consistent BCS threat from the 2nd tier of conferences & have proven they can play with anybody in the country. While they entered this season with solid expectations, because of the inexperience of Fr. QB Kellen Moore, many felt Boise would need some time to get things rolling. Instead, Moore looks like the best newcomer in the nation under-center (1600 yards, 72%, 13 TD, 3 INT). Playing w/ an O-Line most Big 10 teams would kill for, a lethal rushing attack w/ seventh-year RB Ian Johnson (ova 3700 career rushing yards & 50 TD) & scatback Jeremy Avery, and an exciting veteran receiving core, the Broncos have the balance to withstand any defensive style, let alone march on the Spartans

I swear he's been at college longer than Tommy Boy!

While the offensive, the freshman phenom QB, and the blue field receive most the love, the Boise St. defense may be the biggest reason teams in the Big 12 & SEC might be nervous come January. Check out this crazy stat…only one team has scored more than once all year on the Broncos. And that one team, mighty Oregon, was down 37-13 in the 4th before the Ducks exploded for some garbage points.

While San Jose St. stands atop the WAC, unlike our friend here, I can't say they've actually earned it yet!

As for the surprisingly decent Spartans, while they sit atop the WAC, they’ve basically played the cellar-dwellers thus far, and the two times they actually played a top-40 team (Nebraska & Stanford) they lost by a combined score of 58-22. While QB Adam Tafralis’s graduation had San Joseans fearing their raise to mediocrity had stalled, Jr.-transfer Kyle Reed (69%, 7 TD, 6 INT) has performed admirably and has a great sidekick in the diminutive but fierce Yonas Davis (457 yards, 5.0 avg, 2 TD). While they also have some players on the outside, overall the Broncos D is too strong and will control the trenches as the secondary mixes-up their schemes to keep Reed confused.

With Boise St. only needing a win for the tease, my azz will be relaxed on my throne like Kate tonight!

As for the San Jose St. defense, honestly, I have no idea because their 5-wins have come at the hands of some really crappy football teams (Utah St., San Diego St., June’less Hawaii, New Mexico St., and Cal-Davis!). Trust me like you trust your bookie, Broncos take an early lead and keep this between 7-14 most of the night.

Final Score: BRONCOS 31 SPARTANS 20

With an extra week rest those ribs, the most exciting back in the NFL is back in action!

ATLANTA FALCONS @ PHILADELPHIA EAGLES (teased -2)
The Bye Week enabled do-everything Brian Westbrook (ribs) & a bevy of Donovan’s receiving targets to get healthy. Especially w/ McNabb making comments a couple weeks back about his unacceptable play, I’m guessing an extra week of practice did well for the motivated QB. On the defense side, Jim Johnson will be creative in his schemes/blitzes to keep the rookie QB Matt Ryan off-balance, while the run D just needs to continue ranking in the Top-10 in yards allowed (3.5 avg).

While QB Matt Ryan will stand-tall early, look for him to be running for his life by the 3rd!

As for the Burner Turner & Roddy White coming-out party, the Falcons haven’t looked as sharp outside of their dome (besides at GB) and might not enjoy the weather/crowd in Philly. Basically, I get a star-QB off a Bye Week at home against a rookie QB & coach nervously fidgeting through the Bye Week as the great Jim Johnson awaits…and all you want is a FG…ok by me!

Final Score: FALCONS 17 EAGLES 30

Instead of lookin at this pic, her Mom wants u 2 read this:
NFL SUNDAY FUNDAY PLAY O THE DAY & MORE HOTTIES

College Pigskin Record:
NCAA: 12-14 NFL: 6-5 Parlays: 1-3 Teasers: 8-6
To go straight to Teasin’ T-Bone’s college picks, TOUCH ME!

Late October brings out the best in everyone...football equals no helmet and bitch kicks, are you serious?

Good morning my fellow degenerates! There are plenty of season changing games on the slate today….like Texas Tech/Kansas to kick off the day, Penn State/Ohio State to finish things off, and Georgia/LSU sandwiched in the middle like the cream of an Oreo.

Speaking of being sandwiched between something, anyone got a snorkle and some lube for my ears cuz I'm goin' in!! God luv tha Gators!

If I could provide a performance like that behind closed doors I’d be makin’ some coin in a different industry my friends. The game to watch for me is going to be in Columbus, but unlike your sister, I’m staying away from this one like the plague.

Gotta luv a woman ready for Saturdays!!

My homeboy Greggy G has already been rollin’ deep all week. He started off with a Temple cover, then suffered a Tubberville letdown, only to bring it back last night with a teaser cover by the married Ian Johnson and his blue turf Broncos. To check out Double G’s pigskin play of the day, CLICK HERE!

What can Brown do you for, question answered.

I’ve got two ATS winna’s for ya today, and even a lil’ teaser that’ll bring in the lettuce. All I can say is ride me today fellas, cuz I have one of those feelings that only comes around a couple times a year….everything turns to gold today!!

TEASIN’ T-BONE’S PIGSKIN RECORD
NCAA: 13-14 NFL: 6-5 Parlays: 1-3 Teasers 9-6

If you want to go straight to Teasin’ T-Bone’s NFL pick o’ tha day, TOUCH ME!, to stroll thru the ladies just scroll down.

Sports banter and hotties, can someone say TUDDY!!

I come into Sunday Funday with a bit of an overly zealous smile today cuz for the first time in 6 weeks Insideplays walked away with an undefeated Saturday. I have to say thanks to Spartans, Tide, Cavaliers, and Red Raiders for taking care of the business that they knew they could.

She's not much for covering, but she's still my friend!

On the NFL side of the weekend, we are almost to the halfway point of the season and we have found many surprises so far. In the AFC, I bet that no one could have predicted the Pats & Colts with a combined 7-5 record, nor that the Titans would be the only undefeated team left in the league. As for the NFC, the East should be sending all four teams to the playoffs, but there happens to be this rule that says they must play each other, so unfortunately we may have to see the likes of Kurt Warner and Kyle Orton in January.

Looks like a lot of thought goes into Sunday Funday...

But lets not jump too far ahead, in fact lets stick with today, and Greg Gamble has a couple secrets up his sleeve that point directly to Jacksonville and Philly. To see his Sunday Plays, CLICK HERE! Now that you are done with Greggy’s luv, lets grab another drink and roll right into my winnas.

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 31-23 ATS...58%
NFL: 8-11 - NCAA: 13-6 - Teasers: 10-6 - Hotties: 763-0
While my NFL pick sucked, my TEXAS TECH and Teaser picks rolled!

Peyton better get rid of the Pigskin early tonight or he might find himself on the training table this week!

GREG GAMBLE'S MONDAY NIGHT ATS SPECIAL

INDIANAPOLIS COLTS @ TENNESSEE TITANS (-4)
INDIANAPOLIS COLTS @ TENNESSEE TITANS (ova 40)
Before we get to the importance of soft skin, here's my picks!

Some would say playing both the game & the ova/unda is unhealthy, but I heard the same thing bout Baby Oil and I don't usually mind the glossy film...tastes like fruit juice!

Just like Alex Sanders role in Whoriental Sex Academy 4, sometimes you're forced into a lil Menasha Twa even if you don't want to double-dip on a Monday. While I too'v been waiting for Eli’s bro to finally take control of Dungy’s lifeless squad, the Titans have quietly become the most physical, smash-mouth football team in the NFL. And with tonight’s Monday Night stage, I expect the intensity to be off-the-charts as Coach Pornstache Fisher has an already aggressive crew convinced they can embarrass and overpower the undersized, banged-up Colts.

Bo Knows how to Catch the Pill...Bo Scaife that is!

Even though most feel Kerry "For some reason I'm rooting for u" Collins & the offense simply manage the game not to make mistakes, with an O-Line dominating the line-of-scrimmage, double TE sets to keep safeties from cheating, and a thunder n lighting duo in the backfield, Tennessee has scored more the 30 points three times this year and has continued to dominat the time-of-possession in the 2nd half since. Especially with the catalyst of the Colts rush D sidelined (Bob MFin Saunders), Indy's been forced to overload the box (fyi, overloaded boxes are dangerous) and been extremely susceptible to play-action & TEs roaming down the middle

I'm a sucker for WRs and bikini models w/ long legs!

As a result, the Penn State alumnus should look even sharper tonight with the probable return of his lengthy possession WRs 6-2 Justin McCareins & 6-4 Justin Gage, while he’s already found a nice rhythm with Ronny Mexico’s former TD machine Alge Crumpler and the unassuming athleticism & playmaking ability of TE Bo Scaife.

Without their top run-stopper, look for plenty of missed tackles & Chris Johnson to break at least a couple big runs!

As for the LenDale White/Chris Johnson-combo, the former Trojan has pounded teams with his husky FB-frame, which has made Johnson look even faster than his 4.3 speed once he enters the contest. Johnson was unstoppable last year at ECU rushing for 1423 yards, 17 TD, at a 6.0 clip, as well as, averaging 14.3 per reception on his 37 catches. This year, with a minimum of 100 attempts, nobody in the league has a higher rushing average (5.3) than my future Hall-of-Famer Chris Johnson, while he’s also snagged at least two receptions in each game this season. Look for this combo to dominate the Colts & for Collins to continue his efficient play as the Titans start to march up-n-down the field in the 2nd half…especially off the right side behind the most underrated Tackle in the game Michael Roos.

With Haynesworth on the field, Peyton might find himself in this position more often than he'd like tonight!

On the Colts side, while Manning is still capable of a TD pass on every possession...(READ & SEE MORE MAGIC FROM GREGGY G)

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 33-23 ATS...59%
NFL: 10-11 - NCAA: 13-6 - Teasers: 10-6 - Hotties: 969-0
Did you miss my flawless picks yesterday…TOUCH ME HERE

You can take the Thundering Herd if you'd like, but I'm not trusting a team coached by David MFin Wooderson!

HOUSTON COUGARS (-8) @ MARSHALL THUNDERCATS
The Cougars 4-3 record is a blessing as Vegas hasn’t jacked-up the lines on their high-flying offense yet. With a new headmaster in Kevin Sumlin (former Oklahoma offensive coordinator & assistant coach at Texas A&M back when they were good), new schemes implemented by former Texas Tech O-coordinator Dana Holgorsen (left to get out of Mike Leeach’s enlarging shadow) & veteran defensive coordinator John Skladany (10 years as Cyclones D-coordinator before coaching UCF’s kick-azz defense last year), and plenty of young superstars, the Cougars needed some time to find a rhythm. And since their 28-25 loss at Colorado St. on 9/20, the Case Keenum (69%, 23 TD, 6 INT) led Texans have won three straight & averaged over 43 ppg.

Opponents have seen plenty of backside when Case & Co. have the pigskin...too bad for them it doesn't look this good!

Even during the 2nd week of the season, the Cougars proved they could score on anybody with a 56-37 loss at #9 Oklahoma St. Former Head Coach Art Briles (now at Baylor) should be thanked for the plethora of young talent he left behind as Houston can compete with anybody in the country when it comes to playmakers. Sophomore QB Case Keenum was spectacular his freshman campaign, but many feared the offense would take a step back with the departure of new St. Louis Rams fantasy star Donnie Avery & workhouse RB Anthony Alrige (Broncos). Instead, Sumlin & Holgorsen found out they have more options than a white guy with expensive shoes in Thailand.

The Cougars have a fresh young face in their backfield!

True freshman RB Bryce Beall broke the hearts of plenty Big 12 schools when he decided to jump right onto the field at Houston and has been everything they expected…and a little more (557 yards, 6.3 avg, 7 TD and 151 yrds receiving). While Keenum is actually 2nd on the team in rushing (164 yrds, 2 TD), Jr. Andre Kohl is a perfect duel threat when Beall needs a break (rush & rec – 262 yrds, 3 TD) and should find a more action tonight with the colder conditions.

With all the HR-skills on the outside, look for Keenum to burn the Herd for a few big plays with his feet!

As for the passing game, because of his athleticism and sweet hands, Sr. Mark Hafner (6-3, 230) has dominated as a spread-style TE (52 rec. 8 TD) controlling the middle of the field. Perfectly complimenting his possession skills, tiny-tot RS-FR speedsters Patrick Edwards (5-9, 165) & Tyron Carrier (5-7, 150) are a threat to take it to the house every time they touch the pill (87 rec. 9 TD) and have worked themselves into the running game with a few end-arounds and reverses. Throw-in the development of former QB & possibly the most gifted athlete on the squad in 6-2, 210 lb L.J. Castile (15.1 avg, 4 TD), and Holgorsen arguable has more dangerous playmakers than he did back in Lubbock. Especially w/ the extra practice time this week...

No need to give me that look, I have more INSIDE INFO FOR YA

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 33-24 ATS...58%
NFL: 10-11 - NCAA: 13-6 - Teasers: 10-6 - NBA: 0-0

And we thought he took things hard in Chicago!

The Professional Hardwood is back Homeboys and ensures everyday we have an opportunity to increase our assets…or in some cases, force us to cash-in our 401K. While I received a plethora of fan-mail about not providing a Bulls preview, in addition to not making any NBA ATS plays, last night I scouted without a rooting interest to warm-up for tonight. While my NBA/Bulls Preview will be out until tomorrow, I do have a lil something for ya on yesterday’s contest…Scottie Skiles is in for a long-azz season! He actually played Luke “Skiles preaches D, but I can’t play D” Ridnour, Malik Allen, Luc Mbah a NoShot, Tyronn Lue, Charlie “One-knee” Bell, and Dan Gadzuric for 128 minutes last night! As for the Bullies, while I loved Vinny Del Baio’s rotation, believe Derrick Rose is the most explosive PG ever to hit the Association, and can’t get ova the depth of their roster, I have a feeling this season might only provide highlights and excitement for the future…but maybe that’s exactly what we need. With that, let’s hit-up three plays to open Greggy G’s NBA 2008 Spectacular:

Rumor has it plenty of Warriors want a ride out of town!

NEW ORLEANS HORNETS (-6) @ GOLDEN ST. WARRIORS
The fun-n-gun of Nellie’s show just doesn’t have the same swagger with DeMarcus Nelson & Marcus Williams replacing Baron Davis at the point and Monta MoPed unavailable to race down the sideline. Throw-in the unlikely probability of a third consecutive year of S-Jax actually behaving, especially since he’s playing the disrespect-card on the lack of a contract extension, and reports Al Harrington has gone to management claiming in no-longer can play for Coach Nelson, and I bet Nelson quits before the seasons ova. Especially with the depth of talent in the West, trust me, this season will be complete and utter disaster unless you have a couple Warriors on your fantasy squad.

If she's wearing Hornets colors...that works for me!

On the Hornets side...(KEEP READING)

GREG GAMBLE’S 2008 PIGSKIN PICKS - 33-24 ATS...58%
NFL: 10-11 - NCAA: 13-6 - Teasers: 10-6 – ( NBA: 0-2 )

Talk about a rough opening to the season for Stevie Nash, last night it was Tony Longoria and tonight it's CP3!

NEW ORLEANS HORNETS (+3.5) @ PHOENIX SUNS
While both squads opened the season with wins last night (Hornets by five at GST & Suns by five ova the Spurs), I have a feeling the first back-to-back contest after extended minutes gives an advantage to the young legs from New Orleans. Especially considering the extra emotion from having Timmy D & Tony Longoria in town last night, not to mention how drained Shaq looked while trying to come-up with witty lines for the post game, I expect to see some quick substitutions by newbie Terry Porter and his already shaky bench.

Just like our friend, Paul should look flawless in the desert!

I know the Hornets were far from spectacular running with Nellie’s swingman last night, but for that reason, I expect CP3 to set the tone early for his teammates and to isolate Shaq on the pick-n-roll against West or Chandler (questionable)…and force the far-from-chiseled vet to keep-up w/ them in transition. Since Nash can’t & won’t spent too much time one-on-one with Paul, look for Byron Scott to exploit the Canadian’s match-up with the bruising James Posey sliding over to SG. Unlike against the AARP Spurs where Nash could stand on the perimeter with Bruce Bowen & Roger Mason, with the power of Posey & Peja’s length, they don’t really have a spot to hide him.

Even from his High School days in Caly...

Tyson's always had the emotion you want...but now,

...he pairs that with some solid bball IQ!/strong>
BTW, Byron & CP3 will easily have the best record in the NBA if they stay healthy, but probably need another solid big to win it all...word!