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Monday Night ATS Picks & Happiness

NCAA: 11-5 - NFL: 8-9 - Teasers: 9-6 - Hotties: 722-0
Greggy G's results this week: 2-2 ATS with Denver +3 tonight!

It's Black n White boys...unlike Dicky Belichick, I've been w/out her boyfriend for years & still have a winning record!

From the evil-hatred that entered my cell phone yesterday, I guess .500 ATS for the weekend is unacceptable considering my status in the Handicapping World….c'mon my friends, give me a break, I still have the Broncos tonight to push me into the green. And don’t blame my azz cause ur unwilling to tease. From what I've heard...Money, Women and Teasin' make the world go round. Actually, considering my record without Tom Brady is 28-20 while Coach Gym Sweatshirt is 40-66 without Gisele’s Boyfriend, I apologize to nobody.

Somewhere along the way this cat morphed from this...

...into this. Congrats Mr. Orton, you the shiznit!

Briefly on the Bears, congrats on the win and thanks for the entertaining drunk flag-football contest, but honestly…that was uglier than foreshadowing Pamela & Tommy’s saggy sex video at age 60. Even with the artist formerly known as Krazy Kyle looking more and more like a fringe Pro Bowler, if Brad Childress & the Vikings weren’t the most undisciplined self-destructive team in the league the Bears would’ve lost. That being said, with the lousy state of the division and a perfectly-placed Bye Week to revive the secondary, tough to see how they don’t battle with Green Bay till the very end...good luck

Just like Kate, no matter if he was wearing home or road colors tonight, I think Cutler's a picture perfect choice!

I know many gridiron gurus believe this stat is overhyped, but in my opinion, screw those fools…the great-Billy Belichick’s record is 16 games unda-.500 without Tommy B unda-center! For all the geniusness he supposedly possesses, nobody can convince me he’s actually better than the man coaching across the field tonight. Just like the smug Dicky B, Mike Shanahan has won a couple World Titles with a Hall of Fame QB, but unlike Bill “if you're not cheating, you're not trying” Belichick, he’s actually had plenty of playoff opportunities without one.

You might like this look...

...but I'd rather take this!

You also might think this is hot...

...but I'd rather give her the "Hotness" crown!

As a result, while I’ll give you some technical breakdowns on why the Broncos win outright a lil later, in the simplest form…Two solid coaches & teams, with one possessing a Pro Bowl-QB and the other a career clipboard-QB. I’ll delve deeper into how the Broncos-offense is more dangerous than Las Vegas during NBA All-Star Weekend and the Pats defense/age is not equipped to staying on the field because of a stagnate offense, but honestly, all you need to know is Cassell can’t hang with what the Broncos put on the board.

No disrespect, but Belichick without Brady kind of reminds me of Lindsay Lo without the fun party-girl act...

...just another red-head in a bathing suit!
For more Pats/Broncos Breakdowns & Bikinis...TOUCH ME HERE

While the Pats were in Caly the last few weeks, I'm guessin' the old-cats were a lil too tired to hit the beach!

Especially after 2 weeks out west, you think the AARP-vets were a lil tired once they finally hit Beantown? As mentioned last week, the biggest adjustment for the Pats D w/out Brady is not having the extended rest because of long drives by the offense, as well as, the usual luxury of knowing the opponents are in consistent passing situations because their playing catch-up. Throw-in a substandard secondary compared to year’s past, and playmakers like Brandon Marshall & Eddie Royal should have plenty of room to operate, not to mention TE Daniel Graham probably knows New England’s tendencies more than most & should find openings once Cutler rolls out (starting TE Scheffler-questionable).

Just like Cynthiara, Jay keeps his eyes peeled on the move!

Speaking of Cutler (6-3, 230 lb) and his ridiculous ability/creativity on the run, I’m buying the theory of his development from 4 years running for his life on a SEC bottom-feeder (Vandy). While plenty of QBs can put-up huge numbers for small schools playing against other small schools and the top-rated QBs rarely are touched with their royal-offensive line treatment (USC, Texas, Ohio State, etc.), Cutler and his riffle arm chose the toughest route to future success, and as a result, the Broncos have been rewarded with a roll-out master with eyes in the back-of-his-head. Even with a banged-up group of WRs (Stokley-out, Marshall/Royal-probable), the always potent Bronco rushing attack should enable some play-action magic from Capt. Commodore...btw, watch the veteran Pittman kill on the screen pass!

Unlike the Broncos D relaxing as Cutler moves the pill, the Pats LBs might be on all 4's by the 4th!

While I agree the Broncos D is extremely undersized and is no better than middle of the pack, watching them disrupt a balanced Tampa-attack with a veteran QB, I expect Shanahan and the staff to duplicate many of the Lightning Bolt schemes on Cassell from a week ago to keep him in duress. Cassell’s spiraling-lack of confidence with each passing 1st half possession last Sunday was more uncomfortable to watch than Paris Hilton on Saturday Night live. After failing miserable on a few deep balls early, the USC-sideline-staple simply danced around before checking down to a RB. Obviously a running game could aid in his productivity, but once again, besides the fact they don’t have a top-tier RB, their O-line is designed to play Sega Football w/ Bundchen’s Boy at the helm. Seriously, are you really scared of Sammy Morris?

It's never good when your QBs undershirt reads this

Honestly, the scariest aspect of this game is the fact The Book has kept Denver +3 even though the money has been pouring in for Shanahan & Co. Basically, what their saying is on a neutral field these two teams are equal. If that’s the case, I’ll take the one with Cutler, a pretty damn good coach, and a dude named Champ shadowing a WR playing at 80%. How much you wanna bet (legally of-course) we either see Pats back-up QB Kevin O'Connell or Matt Gutierrez 2night?

Final Score: BRONCOS 30 PATRIOTS 20

And finally, revisiting the bikini/coaching-theme, if Belichick w/out Brady is Lindsay Lohan in a bikini...
...then Shanahan w/ Cutler is Amanda frickin Kerr hotness!

Posted by Greg Gamble on October 20, 2008 11:05 AM |


This page contains a single article from October 20, 2008 11:05 AM.

The previous days article was TEASIN' T-BONE'S NFL ATS PICKS.

The next days article was Mea Culpa Homeboys, Mea MFin Culpa!.

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