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Before we discuss how Chucky's gonna destory BOOBinelli & the Lions Sunday, we have some MAC action to play tonight!

Just like I was amazed the writers from the orginal-90210 decided to kill-off my main Jergens partner Rebeeca Gayheart (aka the Noxema Girl aka I want to hump the sofa after watching her in Urban Legend), even converting a 67% clip on Teasers, I’m amazed how many of my gambling constituents have told me they simply refuse to Tease. Especially in cases like tonight’s contest where the MAC Championship is on the line between C. Michigan & Ball St. (-7), I’m confident I know who will win, but just like most girls, I’m afraid of the back-end cover. Nothing is worse than scouting a game, watching your proclamations come true, but losing on a last second TD as your coach doesn’t understand it’s not about winning…it’s about covering the points.

Just like how much easier it would if they were smaller, it's easier to cover a spread once you tease it down!

For example, let’s say Ball St. is up 13 midway thru the 4th tonight & starts dropping their safeties to prevent a quick score. Next thing you know, Dan “Do-Everything” LeFevour finds the endzone w/ two minutes to go and your left telling your girl X-Mas is canceled this year. In my humble, correct opinion, nothing beats teasing a game down so you can simply pick the winner. And tonight, all I need is Nate Davis (68%, 20 TD, 6 INT), Mighty Mouse RB MiQuale Lewis (1273 ryrds, 5.9 avg, 17 TD), and an undefeated defense ranked 50 spots higher than the turnstile Chippewa D. I know this game is in Mt. Pleasant and the place will be rockin', but I just can’t see how a team so reliant on LeFevour’s legs (who’s missed 2 of his last 4 games because of ankle injuries) can pull-off the upset in these cold-azz conditions.

While they miss Dante Love's playmaking ability, he's been the inspiration that has brought them to another level!

Just look at their last common opponent, N. Illinois. After opening strong, C. Michigan needed OT to beat the pesky Huskies, the week prior, Ball St. put a 31-point pasting on them. And as mentioned at nausea, the unblemished Cards are not just playing for a national ranking & a spot in the record books, their playing for a fallen teammate. Dante Love, who ignored NFL overtures and retuned to school after 100 catches in ’07, had a career-ending spinal injury in the 4th game this year, and has now become the inspiration of a team with a special bond & special dreams. While Love won’t physically aid in tonight’s contest, trust me, he’s one of the main reasons they’ve looked unbelievably focused and have won by an average of 27 ppg since the incident. Not even the gambling gods will f*ck with that…well, if you tease it of course. As a result, I’m teasing Ball St down to -1 with…

TEASERS...preventing backend covers for years!


Trust me…Chucky’s crazy eyes don’t overlook anybody. The Bucs have not clinched shiznit of yet and are only a week removed from a Bye Week that rejuvenated their playoff passion push. Throw-in RB Warrick Dunn looking to prove he can still be a feature back with the season-ending injury to Earnest Graham, and I expect the tough Tampa squad to absolutely pound the worst the team in football. Rod BOOBinelli’s hapless squad ranks dead last in rushing defense (ranked 2nd to last overall) and has actually played worse at home as the fan base openly mocks the squad & treats the afternoon like a comedy show. Considering the players know BOOBinelli is the most lame-duck coach in NFL history, the players are already looking towards the off-season and begging their agents to get them out of Dodge…or Ford for that matter (damn my azz clever).

Would you even be suprsied if BOOBinelli worked the sideline of Sunday with pink polka-dotted panties on his head?

Topping things off, the Lions made one of the most idiotic moves a few weeks ago signing and starting Dante Culpepper…and let’s not even discuss the fact that he’s not any good anymore. Detroit has two young QBs (Drew Stanton & Dan Orlovsky), is playing for nothing, and if they were actually correct in thinking Dante could help them win games, might have screwed-up their draft position. Basically, that just sums-up how stupid this organization is. Not much else to say because I’m probably taking the Lions -8.5 as well, but teasing Tampa to unda a FG seems easier than rounding second base after telling a freshman sorority girl you love her and enables me to watch tonight’s contest without worrying about the points!

With that, let's hit-up some NBA Action & more Hotties!

With the Wolves 1-8, I hear Coach Wittman is sweating more than our girl Kelly about keeping his job!

To all the hardwood gurus jumping off the Sixers bandwagon after a slow start, after having nobody with the ability to score with their back-to-the-basket the last few years, did you really think bringing in a major low-post threat (Elton Brand) would be a quick transition? After opening 2-5, Mo Cheeks & Co. have reeled of three-straight, including road victories at Toronto & Indiana, and absolutely destroying Oklahoma City in their last contest (110-85).

Just like this youngster, Thad looks sweet in Philly red!

Throw-in the continuing development of possibly the best player on the roster by the start of next year, Thad Young (last two games: 24 ppg, 64%, 7rpg), and I expect Philly to climb in the standings from here on out. Iggy, Andre Miller, & Sammy D round out an athletic and long staring line-up, while the bench has more talent than the average fan can understand highlighted by G Lou Williams (Monta Ellis-type without the MoPed) G Willie Green (49 fg%, 53 3pt%), and rebounding phenom Reggie “Nut-grabbin” Evans.

They way she grabs the ball reminds me of Reggie Evans!

As for the T-Wolves, they absolutely suck. Not only does Kevin Love look lost playing against big strong black dudes and Corey Brewer still hasn’t hit a jumper, but some of the moves Coach Wittman (soon to be Ex-Coach Wittman) has made are beyond comprehension. First he moved Randy Foye to the bench for frickin Sabby . Then he decided it was smart to start one of the Collins brothers at Center. And finally, after Telfair struggled in his new role he decided Kevin frickin Ollie was their next best choice to run the point. Since their lucky two-point home opening win to lowly Sacramento, the Wolves have lost eight straight and seem to be loosing confidence by the night…so don’t be shocked when you look at their record in January and they still have single digit wins…Sixers by 8-14 points

Stay warm tonight fellas...it's gonna be a cold one!

Posted by Greg Gamble on November 19, 2008 1:09 PM |


This page contains a single article from November 19, 2008 1:09 PM.

The previous days article was Daily ATS Sports Banter & Friendly Figures.

The next days article was Thursday Night NFL ATS Magic & Hotness.

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