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Monday Night ATS, Bears Recap, & Bikinis

NFL 19-15 - NCAA 17-11 - Teasers 18-9 - Ladies 89-0

I have a great idea, let's give our practice squad FB his 1st NFL carry on 3rd & 1 at the goal-line against this guy!

Before we hit-up the Monday Nighter, closing out the long weekend with crappy booze, a Turner brother making terrible decisions, and arguably the worst WR-core in NFL history was just not a very sane idea…and because the cats at my crib drank all my good booze this weekend, I was forced to rummage through my ole college trunk to muster out a three-quarters full bottle of Hawkeye Vodka and feel like Lindsay Lohan (and look like Nick Nolte) after an all-nighter.

Why not have Kyle Orton do this at least once at the goaline?

To start, the fact Norv & Ron Turner continue to be employed on the professional gridiron is beyond comprehendible. While Norv allowed a young Falcon team to travel cross country and bitch-slapped his suddenly pathetic squad, Ron was figuring out how to get his newly activated and former Illini-FB into the game plan. And when does he decide to give Mr. Jason Davis his first NFL carry…with the Bears looking to take control late in the 2nd quarter on a crucial 3rd & goal from the 1-yard line Yeah, great decision on that one Ron, up the middle with a Practice Squad FB and the Williams brothers hunkered down against the undersized Olin Kreutz...get a clue Homeboy!

While I desperately want Anquan Boldin this off-season, maybe trading for Packin' Plaxico is more realistic financially!

As for the horrific performance in the passing game, while the Neck-Bearded Wonder was abysmal in the 2nd half, I believe the blame of last night’s debacle should be shouldered by GM Jerry Angelo. For all the chatter about Orton’s lousy numbers in the 1st half (I saw at least three crucial drops), besides Devin Hester, none of the Bears WRs have the ability to actually get open, let alone have the size to provide a jump-ball opportunity on the outside. And considering Hester can only run two routes and needs time to locate the football, he’s still nothing more than a gadget player in my mind.

I like Tight Ends as much as the next guy, but what the Bears need are frickin' talented Wide Receivers!

Seriously, Brandon “Aligator Arms” Lloyd must have a crush on somebody in the training room, Marty “I was really good 10 years ago” Booker is done, and Rashied Davis is the nothing more than a nice 3rd or 4th WR. If Angelo doesn’t convince the McCaskey’s to open the vault for Anquan Boldin or another big-time playmaker, TE Greg Olsen will continue to be underutilized & shadowed by a safety, while RB Matt Forte will be heading to retirement by the time he’s 25 if they don’t get him some help...Paging Plaxico Burress…Paging Plaxico Burress!

Sage is overdue for a happy ending...I luv u longtime!

I know most of you will think this is merely a sympathy play because of my allegiance to Cyclone Sage Rosenfels, but can you really see the Gridiron Gods bitch-slapping the poor-guy again…this time on the Monday Night stage? For all the embarrassment and utter disrespect he has for protecting the pigskin, the agile 6-4 QB has completed 68% of his passes this season and will be facing an overly aggressive Jags defense susceptible to Sage’s specialty…play-action roll-outs.

Only a few things look nicer than Andre stretched out!

The Texans rank 4th in the NFL in total offense and have found a nice balance to their passing game with the emergence of rookie Steve Slaton (774 rush yrds, 4.9 avg, 32 recpetions) and have a much improved O-Line. In the passing game, WRs Andre Johnson (81 rec 1071 yrds), Kevin Walter (14.2, 7 TD), and TE Owen Daniels (48 catches) have the size to cause trouble for a "route-jumping" secondary that bites on play-action and ranks near the bottom in TD passes allowed. With only one solid cover corner (Reshean Mathis) and a pass-rush that has disappointed this season, look for Rosenfels to find extra time on the roll-out to exploit those weaknesses. Especially if Slaton can establish the ground attack early, Houston should be able to march up-n-down the field gaining confidence as the game rolls on and riling-up the underrated Reliant Stadium home-crowd.

While it's tough to contain two big weapons (MJD & Taylor), she's proving that it's possible...READ WHY HOMEBOYS!

As for when the Jaguars have the ball...

She's proving once again containment is possible!

As for when the Jaguars have the ball, considering their best playmakers are in the backfield (MJD & Fred Taylor), what does it say about their O-line that they only gained 35 yards on 14 carries in last week’s 12-30 home-loss? Decimated by injuries all year, they've struggled with their consistency and have allowed the mobile David Garrard to be sacked 30 times thus far…and he enters tonight’s contest with bruised ribs. While 6-6 DE Mario Williams (eight sacks) hasn’t found the QB in three weeks, look for the freakish talent to have a monster game against the slow-footed left side of the Jags line. While Garrard has played admirably this season, without any playmakers the Jags have resorted to a short passing game and plenty of dump-offs to MJD. As a result, look for the Texans CBs to jam the WRs and keep a spy on the speedy tailback all-night.

Looking ova ur should can look good for some, but not for those playing on the gridiron!

In closing, both teams sit at 4-7, but the Texans continue to play with passion and should be psyched for the Monday Night battle in front of the home-crowd. On the flipside, Jacksonville seems to be self-destructing and rumors have major personnel changes coming on both sides of the ball next year. Having lost four of their last five and looking over their shoulder for a quick hook, I just don't see the swagger that made them special last year or the playmakers to keep-up on the scoreboard with Andre Johnson, Steve Slaton, and MFin Sage Rosenfels tonight!

Final Score: JAGUARS 20 TEXANS 30

With all the snow in Chi-Town...
...what a perfect night to cuddle-up a watch some MNF!

Posted by Greg Gamble on December 1, 2008 1:00 PM |


This page contains a single article from December 1, 2008 1:00 PM.

The previous days article was INSIDEPLAYS NFL ATS PICKS.

The next days article was Home of NBA ATS Action & Pretty Faces.

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